As most of you know, I am moving to Israel in just a few weeks- on Sept 5. A lot of people think I'm crazy; many don't understand why I'm leaving America for a dangerous and difficult place like Israel; and I know my mom is wondering how she let this happen.... What did she do wrong that her daughter has to move thousands of miles away?

Today I'd like to clarify and reassure you Mom- you've done nothing wrong. I'd like to talk about everything you did right, because it is your Judaism, Zionism, and unwavering support for my dreams and ambitions that has led to my decision to move to Israel. I would also thank the Aitz Hayim community, the Slutskys, Irwin, and the rest of my family, because without you I would never be where I am today and I would never have had the desire or opportunity to make Aliyah.

My Mom keeps asking, "So Nicole-when exactly did you decide that you needed to move to Israel?" What she doesn't realize is that to me it feels like my whole life has been leading to this moment.

When I was five years old, a kindergartner at Schechter Day School, I learned a song about Israel-Eretz zavat Halav u'davash-Israel was a land flowing with milk and honey. I took this literally and couldn't wait to visit.

In second grade I knew the Israeli National Anthem-HaTikvah-before I knew the American national anthem. My extended family thought I was a traitor, but my parents just beamed with pride at their second grader's Hebrew skills.

When I was eleven I got my first real taste of Israel. The Silbermans and Slutskys graciously took me with them on their family trip and changed my life forever. I lived in Herzliya, went to Israeli summer camp, and sang Israeli cheers. I learned that Israel was in many ways a land flowing with milk and honey. But I also discovered that Israelis could be pushy, rude, loud, and smelly. But, I loved them and their country anyway, and so I hope that Naftali, my Israeli boyfriend, forgives me for saying that!

During my junior year of high school war broke out in Israel and Israelis were being killed nearly every day by suicide bombers and terrorist attacks. Aitz Hayim decided that this was the perfect time to send multiple missions to Israel-tickets were cheap, the nicest hotels were empty, and Israeli breakfasts couldn't be beat-so we were off. My parents were never afraid; instead they were ecstatic that we could finally go to Israel as a family.

I look back on Marc's leadership and the resolve of the Aitz Hayim community to continue visiting Israel during that difficult time of the second intifada as one of the pivotal periods of my life. It was then that I realized that even though I was an American, I had a responsibility to Israel that couldn't be waived-even during the dangerous and desperate times of war. A Jewish State cannot exist without Jews who want to live in it. If we as American Jews desert Israel during the scary or uncertain times then we have failed as members of the Jewish and Israeli community. For thousands of years Jews longed to return to the land of Zion- Lahiyot Am Hofshe b'Ertzenu - we never lost hope that one day we would be a free people in our own land. I too have not lost hope that one day Jews will be free in the land of Israel.

In this week's Parsha, Eikev, Moses continues his final address to the people of Israel before he dies. They will enter the land of Canaan, but he will not, and it seems he has gone a little crazy as a result. Moses describes to the people of Israel what is about to happen: "For the Lord your God is bringing you to a good land, a land with brooks of water, fountains and depths, that emerge in valleys and mountains. A land of wheat and barley, vines and figs and pomegranates, a land of oil producing olives and honey. A land in which you will eat bread without scarcity, you will lack nothing in it, a land whose stones are iron, and out of whose mountains you will hew copper. And you will eat and be sated, and you shall bless the Lord, your God, for the good land he has given you." This is a surprisingly accurate description of the land of Israel: It is a beautiful land, with beautiful people, and I want its destiny to be my own. When Hannah Senesh arrived in what was then Palestine she wrote to her mom: "I am home... This is where my life's ambition-I might even say my vocation-binds me, because I would like to feel that by being here I am fulfilling a mission." I share Hannah Senesh's feeling that when I am in Israel I am home. I am at home amongst the loud Israelis, I am at home on the beaches of Tel Aviv, and I am at home on the streets of Nahariya- a beautiful town that is currently being destroyed by Hezbollah rockets. In the midst of this devastating situation with Lebanon, perhaps now is the time for Aitz Hayim to start planning its next mission.

So why am I moving to Israel? How did I get here? Because Israel is a Jewish country - and I am a Jew. I feel that everything that happens in Israel affects me. Now it is my chance to affect Israel. And I will do that by living there. Life there may not be easy, but it is meaningful. I want Israel to succeed, I want the country to flourish, I want Israelis to thrive. And I want to make it happen.

There is a pasuk in Pirke Avot that reads, "If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And if I am only for myself, what am I?" To this I would add, And if I will not be in Israel, who will be in Israel? and the pasuk concludes "And if not now, when?"

Nicole Vahlkamp
B.A. Government & Politics and Economics
University of Maryland